The Kent Voss Parody Page

Sponsored by Vosser's Scrapple

Soapy
The original "Man behind the curtain"

Kent from his guest appearance on
South Park

Another little known fact is that Kent finished in second place for the audition for the voice of...
Homer Simpson!... DOH!

Hear Kent's demo...
(this will stop the background music)

We have secretly taped Kent while golfing
Click the golfer to hear Kent

Kent's favorite links

worldcupsoccersucksbigtime.com
(oh come on, you didn't try to click on that did you?)

Voss World

The Kent Voss Show
WWDB-FM 96.5

The one and only King
...of Pork parts

The self anointed King of Scrapple. Although being the King of leftover porcine renderings is somewhat a dubious distinction, Kent bears the responsibility well. Moving to Philly just last year Kent studied all things Philadelphian but had a vision while on tour of a local hog rendering plant. "Now that's some pig!" he said while examining some prime livestock. While watching the actual rendering (not something for the faint of heart) he asked the plant foreman; "You don't waste all these leftover parts do you?" "No", was the reply. "Here, let me show you..." and Scrapple Fest was born.

"It was like a religious experience." Kent would later say of his encounter with Scrapple. "Almost better than sex."

Jobs that Kent wants;

Peter Arnett's - "How tough can his job be? Just show up, read a few lines, take all the credit, get paid, go home. Hey, where do I sign up?"

Foreign Envoy - "Now that's gotta be cool!"

A primer on Redneck Medical Terms - Part 1
Artery.....................The study of paintings.
Benign.....................What you be after you be eight.
Bacteria...................Back door to cafeteria.
Barium....................What doctors do when patients die.
Cesarean Section.....A neighborhood in Rome.
Catscan...................Searching for Kitty.
Cauterize.................Made eye contact with her.
Colic.......................A sheep dog.
Coma......................A punctuation mark.
D&C.......................Where Washington is.
Dilate.......................To live long.
Enema......................Not a friend.
Fester.......................Quicker than someone else.
Fibula.......................A small lie.
Genital......................Non-Jewish person.
G.I.Series.................World Series of military baseball.
Hangnail....................What you hang your coat on.
Impotent...................Distinguished, well known.
Labor Pain................Getting hurt at work.
Medical Staff.............A Doctor's cane.
Morbid......................A higher offer than I bid.
Nitrates.....................Cheaper than day rates.
Node.........................I knew it.
Outpatient.................A person who has fainted.
Pap Smear................A fatherhood test.
Pelvis........................Second cousin to Elvis.
Post Operative..........A letter carrier.
Recovery Room.........Place to do upholstery.
Rectum......................Darn near killed him.
Secretion...................Hiding something.
Seizure......................Roman emperor.
Tablet........................A small table.
Terminal Illness..........Getting sick at the airport.
Tumor.......................More than one.
Urine.........................Opposite of you're out.
Varicose....................Near by.